We can learn a lot about the importance of proper word choice from the mistakes of foreigners.

I was in a Chinese restaurant in Spain and as if their troubled translation of the menu into Spanish wasn’t bad enough, they had also translated it into English.  Next to some of the menu items there were asterisks.  I looked to the bottom of the menu were the asterisks were explained and expecting to see the word spicy or vegetarian I read this: “These dishes are no longer in existence”.

Ok I’ll admit there’s nothing really wrong with the grammar here.  It’s just so outlandish.  What is most compelling to me (nothing to do with writing) is that these people reprinted their menu and rather than take the items off, they chose to memorialize them.   If the phrase had read, “these dishes are no longer served” it would have been very pedestrian, very normal.  But “existence” balls us over; it elevates the phrase to the level of poetry.

As writers we should employ strategy in the use of our words.  There are times to be very clear even predictable and other times when it is nice to surprise or shock.  The element at work in the phrase on the menu is surprise and the effect is humor.  What makes the word “existence” so powerful is the context.  If it had been in a speech about lost lives the word would have been merely factual.  But existence for a menu item – it’s hilarious.